Fate Of The Union

Let’s not ignore the 800 pound elephant-gorilla-pig-hybrid in the room.  It’s true what they said about swine flu.  When they said it would spread everywhere and probably touch a majority of the world’s nations, they were right.  When they said it would cause flu-like symptoms so if you run a fever and vomit you should see a doctor, they were right.  When they said your life is in danger and if you know someone with swine flu you should kill them before they infect the rest of the world and murder us all, kickstarting the zombie apocalypse, forcing we few uninfected into hiding in shanty towns underground, living off the predatory highways, killing radiation fallout mutants for pennies and secretly working for the robots as they slowly garner the military strength to wager Armageddon on the pathetic humans… they were right.

If you weren’t panicking before, now would be an appropriate time to scream.  Or, if you choose, join the ranks of the Ba’hai faith outside of Harrisburg, Pennsylvania and swap out all of your holy water for hand sanitizer.  We’re all about brotherhood here.  Unless you have to shake that brother’s hand.

Fate of the Union delivers the goods this week.  Dive headfirst into the wonderful waters of overcriminalization with us!  Listen as Peter sucks at Peril! (yes, again)  And hear the latest chapter in the Florida Files, a tale you probably won’t believe unless I told you it was in the news, which it was.

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-Pars Welly

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